Sunday, June 19, 2005

The smallest hands

" Music is like that E.E cummings’s poem about the tiniest hands. It works its way into your heart to touch you and make you feel. That’s all I’m trying to do." -Paula Cole-

This is such a breath-taking poem....I'm in awe. Articulates everything I wish I could say.

Somewhere I have never travelled, gladly beyond
===============================================
-E.E Cummings-

somewhere i have never travelled, gladly beyond
any experience,your eyes have their silence:
in your most frail gesture are things which enclose me,
or which i cannot touch because they are too near

your slightest look will easily unclose me
though i have closed myself as fingers,
you open always petal by petal myself as Spring opens
(touching skilfully,mysteriously)her first rose

or if your wish be to close me, i and
my life will shut very beautifully ,suddenly,
as when the heart of this flower imagines
the snow carefully everywhere descending;
nothing which we are to perceive in this world equals
the power of your intense fragility:whose texture
compels me with the color of its countries,
rendering death and forever with each breathing

(i do not know what it is about you that closes
and opens;only something in me understands
the voice of your eyes is deeper than all roses)
nobody,not even the rain,has such small hands

Friday, June 17, 2005

Black and Grey

It hasn't been a fun wk at all. Started off on a stressful and exasperating note. In the midst of it all, Mich Poh's funky, ironic song "Black and Grey" came to my mind...where some lines go:

"when is black black, and white the colour such? Perhaps grey remains the answer....
some things are not meant to be
in a world that is made so free"

To top it off....this week has seen a record high of two quarrels with 2 good friends. Like I need more drama rite? Ok yes, I admit I can be difficult and snappy when I'm stressed out...so I'm sure my bad mood contributed to the quarrels in some way. Sorry to all those who have been unfortunate victims of my acid tongue btw.

Anyway, one quarrel has been resolved quite well. The other is still hanging....but I'm too tired to deal with it at the moment. But i think that quarrel was good, in that it revealed how we both had different perspectives, expectations of our friendship. Normally we just sweep things under the carpet...and we all know how that can amount to big grudges. I'm sure we'll settle our issues in time to come lah....we've been friends since Sec 1. Like it or not, we're stuck together for life.

I've taken to watching cartoons and The Muppets Show lately to de-stress. It does help...for a while at least. haha! I'm also counting down to Bangkok...ONE MORE WEEK!!! Woohoo!

Well, in the midst of all this emotional drama, I had quite a bizarre experience on a bus one day. I believe I bumped into my ex-bf (now gay). I wasn't sure at first cos of the sun-glasses...n the buffed up, tanned bod (oh gosh, so gay rite?? *cringe*). Later, I saw him alight at a bus stop just after Thomson Medical Centre....and disappear into some bushes (behind was a car park)!!! haha! Hmmm....highly dubious rite? That tickled me quite a bit. Way to go Leslie, what an unglam exit indeed! (he loved using tt word 'unglam' btw. what a diva!)

Thursday, June 16, 2005

Signs Your Boss is Spying On You

How do you know if your boss is actually spying on you? Here are a few starters that might be of help:

Wherever you go you're followed by a potted plant in loafers.

The bracelet he gave you for Christmas blinks if you leave your work station/ cubicle.

Your name:"Ivan." Next to your parking spot: "Reserved for the guy following Ivan"

Your new secretary looks a lot like that chick from "Alias"

Instead of photos of wife and kids on his desk, he has a photo of you sleeping.

When you're alone in the men's room, a voice tells you to quit blocking the lens.

There seem to be a blinking red light inside the smoke detector.

The fax machine just coughed.

Thursday, June 09, 2005

"Like a beautiful smile"- Sting

Trust Sting to pen a slick jazz-rock (before watching his dvd, i had no idea there was such a genre in the first place) tune based on Shakespeare's Sonnet 18. Only he can pull it off so effortlessly and stylishly. He literally just pulled his Shakespeare poetry book off his bk-shelf, and came up with the infectious guitar riff to go with the words. Genius...

I love the title of this song... :)Brings to mind sweet memories.
----------------------------------------------------------

Shall I compare thee to a summer's day?
Thou art more lovely and more temperate.
Rough winds do shake the darling buds of May,
And summmer's lease hath all too short a date.
Sometime too hot the eye of heaven shines,
And often is his gold complexion dimm'd;
And every fair from fair sometime declines,
By chance, or nature's changing course untrimm'd;

Like a beautiful smile
That fills I know why
Such a beauty won't die
It's eternity's mile
That we walk all this while

But thy eternal summer shall not fade,
Nor lose possesion of that fair thou ow'st,
Nor shall death brag thou wander'st in his shade,
When in eternal lines to thime thou grow'st;

Like a beautiful smile
That fills I know why
Such a beauty won't die
It's eternity's mile
That we walk all this while

Like a beautiful dream
That is just what it seems
We're just floating upstream
On eternity's beam
So long as men can breath, or eyes can see,
So long lives this, and this gives life to thee

Shall I compare thee to a summer's day?
Thou art more lovely and more temperate.
Rough winds do shake the darling buds of May,
And summmer's lease hath all too short a date.
Sometime too hot the eye of heaven shines,
And often is his gold complexion dimm'd;
And every fair from fair sometime declines,
By chance, or nature's changing course untrimm'd;

But thy eternal summer shall not fade,
Nor lose possesion of that fair thou ow'st,
Nor shall death brag thou wander'st in his shade,
When in eternal lines to thime thou grow'st;

So long as men can breath, or eyes can see,
So long lives this, and this gives life to thee

Desert rose...literally

Andrea was super stressed out tdy...I wanted to cheer her up, so I bought her this little bouquet of baby roses. Looked quite sweet. Abt an hour later, Bernice my colleague, did the same...went downstairs to get Andrea and myself a rose each(without knowing I also bought Andrea flowers. But Bernice knew tt we were both stressed out). haha!

I knew this would happen one day....cos last wk, when Andrea bought Bernice n I roses....i almost bought for them on that same day. One fine day, all 3 of us will end up buying each other roses on the same day. haha! I'm really grateful for these sisters...they're so sweet.

Bernice is collecting our bangkok tickets tmrw...YAY!!!! I'm really gonna fly outta here. Can't wait.

I just visited Corrinne May's updated website and her blog (www.corrinnemay.blogspot.com). All of you shld check it out...it's really great. I love the quotes she picked out. Like this:

"Every man's life is a fairy tale written by the fingers of God" (Hans Christian Andersen).

Did i tell u guys that she's a NUS Literature grad? :)

Tuesday, June 07, 2005

The need to blahhh....

Ok folks, reading this latest entry might be a tad confusing, cos there's no logical, sequential flow. But i just felt the need to blah out on my blog tonite. :)

I've been in a pretty rotten mood these 2 days...but I've cooled off since....surprisingly, teaching cooled me down, cos my students cheered me up. And also because going for Mich Poh's gig tonite was like a real highlight of my week. Yay! It was fun meeting up with friends there too...even though it was for a short while. Nice change to the mundane routine of a normal work week.

Perhaps I had too hectic a weekend...met too many people, resulted in a severe lack of rest before the new work week started. HOWEVER, I do wanna say that i thoroughly enjoyed meeting up with Eunice on Sun. Felt good to have that catching up, sharing, sarcasm rally session with her again. *evil laughter*

On a more positive note, here are some things that brightened up my week so far:

1) During his excellent sermon on Sun, Ps Edmund Chan made this really touching comment...."there's something abt a song. A song is the mirror of the soul". So simple, but really connected with me in tt moment!

2) Finally....I met Poofy again. He saw me from a distance, recognised me, smiled (beautifully), waved enthusiastically... and later we had a nice, little chat. *wide grinz and contented sigh*
(my life is boring ok, gotta allow me my silly indulgences! haha!)

Friday, June 03, 2005

"A Room Called Remember"

Things that I've been up to of late:

1) buying way too many cds and books as usual....doesn't help that there are cd warehouse sales going on! (i think its some sort of compulsive disease)

2) dragging friends down to the esplanade to hang out...cos I still feel nostalgic about that place after my gigs there, and mebbe also cos I am hoping (against all odds) that I will spot a certain someone, who has since poofed away from my existence.

3) cultivating a new interest in playing rock keyboards! I've been studying this phenomenal fusion rock band "Niacin" that my colleagues DW and Andrea have recommended (they r a trio consisting of Billy Sheehan on bass, John Novello on keys, Dennis Chambers on drums). Their music is like nothing that's been heard before....an incredible,bold combustion of jazz, blues, rock, funk, soul and even classical music. They play with such soul and finesse....I'm truly blown away!

Anywayz, I never thought that I would be able to play rock keyboards...until I decided to play along with the cd just for kicks. It's not that hard afterall...just play by ear. It's really been fun experimenting with the rhythmic comping and exciting sweeps over the keys (i never knew how they did tt. haha!).

I've taken to the bluesy music quite a bit lately too....been connecting to it as it's helped me to express my emotions. Yeah, music is my relief!

4) Organising my long-awaited Bangkok trip (26-29 June)!!! It's just 3 weeks more, YAY!!! I booked my trip via the valuair website last night, with my colleague Bernice. REally looking fwd to it, as I need the break desperately. We went out for supper at Gluttons Bay, Esplanade (yes, I haunt the place religiously) and had a fun time talking about our plans.

Since it was just the 2 of us there, we also managed to have a good, deep,heart-to-heart talk. Something that wld have been difficult with the other colleagues ard. I managed to air my frustrations about someone to her....normally I'm the one who has to be on the 'downloading end'. So it was a refreshing hange. haha!

5) I bought an Ernie stuff toy tdy for Desmond's bday present. Why? Cos he looks like Ernie...and cos i want to buy it, even if he protests. haha!

6) Contemplating the seasons of friendships.
As we get older, as we change....we just find ourselves being drawn to diff friends at diff points of our lives. Such is life. Some pple
whom we used to be super close too....we just don't manage to click with so much now...and perhaps vice versa as well. I am super grateful for my colleagues...that they r also trusted, dear, close friends. I'm just wondering what will happen when Mich Poh leaves BMI....i'm gonna miss her so much. sighz.

7) I've been discussing casually with my band members abt future plans.I can't wait to start gigging again...but for now we don't
know what will happen yet...things are a bit hazy, cos Danny is getting married in Oct and I'm sure Sun practices will be difficult for him to squeeze in. See how...

8) trying not to drink too much beer! haha! well, it helps to de-stress after a day's work...and you can't go to places like Harry's at boat quay and NOT drink! (the live jazz band there is fabulous btw! went there with my band 2 wks back..and will be returning this Sun with kelvin and colleagues. As Suns are open-mic nites, pple can just go up to jam with them....n u get to see some really great musicians in the local gigging circuit)

9) finally..i just need to whine, but why do friends who get attached disappear from the face of the earth and abandon their friends?? I really detest that. So much for friendship man!

That's all for now! *POOF*

"A case of you"

(lyrics by the legendary Joni Mitchell who has inspired many generations of singer/songwriters)

I remember that time you told me, you said,
"Love is touching souls"
Surely you touched mine
'Cause part of you pours out of me
In these lines from time to time
Oh you're in my blood like holy wine
You taste so bitter and so sweet
Oh I could drink a case of you, darling
Still I'd be on my feet
I would still be on my feet.