What would you die for?

"My life has never been this clear
Now I know the reason why I'm here
You never know why you're alive
Until you know what you would die for
I would die for You."

I just bought MercyMe's 2006 album yesterday.....without even listening to it first, because I know their albums are always fantastic. This one was no exception.....and the final song "I Would Die For You" really hit home...in a rather sobering way. It's been a long time since I've been this moved and challenged by a song. Truly, "You never know why you're alive, until you know what you would die for."

Listen to the song and 2 others here: http://jazzymoo.multiply.com/music/item/491

There is an incredible story behind "I would die for You" too...and it's really worth sharing here in its full length. It's about this remarkable kid, BJ Higgins, who really showed the world what it meant to live for Christ. Lord help me...I've got such so much to learn.

"My name is Brent Higgins. BJ Higgins was my son. He was a very ordinary young man, who had an extraordinary grasp on the things of God. Ultimately, he gave his life because he was obedient to God's call. From an early age, after giving his heart to Christ, he shared his faith. He talked to anyone who would listen, about Jesus. He and a friend started a website in which the sole purpose was to bring glory to God. Here he often discussed spiritual issues at length, always with the intent of sharing the gospel. BJ wrote extensively for his age. He wrote mostly in journals. The depth of his understanding is humbling. We have posted many of his writings on prayforbj.com. This website also chronicles his illness, and includes stories about his life from each of his family.

When he was 14, he went on his first overseas mission trip. He spent his summer in Peru with a missions organization called Awe Star. While there, BJ grew a great deal in his faith. He also shared with hundreds of Peruvians, and saw many give their hearts to Christ. At 15, he returned to Peru. Once again, he led countless people to a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. The impact the Lord had through BJ and his team was amazing.

When he returned home this past summer, he came down with a mysterious illness. Doctors believe he contacted the Bubonic Plague while on the mission field. He often spoke and wrote of our need as Christians to be willing to suffer for the cause of Christ, and to be even willing to lay down our lives for Him. He loved his Saviour with all that he was. He fought a valiant six week battle in the hospital, where medical staff used heroic measures to attempt to save him. On September 26 2005, he passed away. Just five days prior to his 16th birthday.

In his life, and in his death, BJ pointed to Christ. His desire was to make Jesus known to all the nations. Moved beyond words, MercyMe has committed to keeping the spirit of BJ alive. Through the Go Foundation, MercyMe is donating 100% of the money generated by the song "I Would Die For You" to send students into the mission field to pick up where BJ left off. I challenge you to follow their lead by contributing to "BJ's Hope". You can visit www.theGofoundation.com to make contributions. BJ would be the first to say it has never been about him, but about advancing the Kingdom of God." -Respectfully, Brent Higgins

"Relate To Me"

“We must stop setting our sights by the light of each passing ship; instead we must set our course by the stars.”-George Marshall

Some thoughts that transpired after a slightly disquieting exchange with a good friend, some insightful Jack Johnson songs, and an evening at the Rachael Yamagata concert. I was quite amazed at how much the young kids loved her songs…they knew all the words, they were cheering loudly for her all the way. But then I realized….they could really relate to her honest songs of broken, wrecked relationships. In her own words, her songs chronicle “the highs and lows of relationships and this delightful junk called love.”

We’re all reaching out for something to fill us….and sometimes, we don’t know when it’s safe to give of ourselves, and how much to give. Still, in spite of the the risks, we plunge into the deep….in the hopes of finding something which we lost a long time ago.
If only we learn to turn to the Author of love….

====================================================================

"Relate to me baby,
don't walk away just yet.
Let's hold on to each other,
I'll be your safety net if you'll be mine."

Me? I'd rather fall into the abyss.
It's gotta be love or nothing at all.
Convenient companionship isn't enough.
At the end of the day, it's just skin on skin.
What seems real, isn't gonna be there tomorrow.
“How's your soul?
Is it still cold?”

"But tell me, what's good enough?
How do you know?
C'mon, no one is perfect gal!"

Maybe I'm an idealist, a lost cause.
But I believe that deep inside you know...
if you're brave enough to listen to your heart
So I’ll keep on travellin’ on my own,
Cos I don’t want to be lonely next to you….

Bizarro

My dear colleague and fwen Bernice (whom I can't live without btw), is very well-known in the office for talking to herself. Her most famous phrase is "Oh Berno!!" Occasionally, she will also refer to herself in 3rd person. eg. "Bernice's head going to explode." And it's a trend that a lot of us have picked up in BMI as well. haha!

However, an incident that occured last night really took the madness to new heights. I must say...it was quite timely too.

10pm@BMI. Danny, Berno and I had just finished our classes.
============================================================
Danny to Berno: You look different today....
Berno: We decided to change my hair-parting!
Danny (looks around....slightly alarmed): Who's WE???
*cue eerie Psycho music*

Mich: *rolling over in laughter* (seriously I was laughing so hard because Berno didn't even realize what she had said. It came out so earnestly)

Gals Night Out@Timbre

Steph's first time@ Timbre. After this, she's leaving for Japan for 3 yrs!!!
Sorry Winnie, still waiting for your pic with you inside. :)

Mighty To Save

I feel as if I'm going to war everyday at the office this week. Well, not battling people, but an insurmountable pile of work and deadlines. I really need God's help in fighting the giants..in facing my fears. God has been showing me Psalm 18 over and over again through various sources (it really is quite amazing)....and the song "Mighty To Save" really is the anthem for the season. :) Pray along with me please as I try to stay afloat.

Psalm 18:1-3
"I love you, O Lord, my strength.
The Lord is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer:
my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge
He is my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold.
I call to the Lord, who is worthy of praise.
And I am saved from my enemies."

"Mighty to Save" (Hillsong)
====================
Saviour, He can move the mountains
My God is mighty to save,
He is mighty to save
Forever, Author of salvation
He rose and conquered the grave
Jesus conquered the grave

"That's Gold!"

I love my students! They're a fantastic, hilarious bunch...they truly make my day. Check out what 2 of them said this week:

G: (after his guitar class, he sits outside my classroom with the rest of his classmates. once my door flings open, he shouts out to them....)
Let's go in and do the singing bit!

haha! gotta love the way he puts it. The 'singing bit'...as opposed to his earlier 'guitar bit'. hehe! I should hang that outside my door as a sign. "Let's go in and do the singing bit!" Brilliant!

Jet: (After class he sings the old 80's McDonald's "Rockin' Hotcakes" TV commercial jingle.)
"If you wake up, to a happy sound...yummy yummy yum, yummy yum yum yum! The rockin' hotcakes are comin' around. Shoobee dah buh doo bah arr rump perr pumm pum! the rockin hotcakes are really neat!"

Check out a video of the actual ad here: http://www.retrojunk.com/details_commercial/141/
Nobody can resist dancing, singing hotcakes man!

Poiema

"For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works," Paul wrote to the Ephesians. 'Workmanship' conveys rather clumsily the meaning of the Greek word poiema, origin of the English word 'poem'. We are God's work of art, Paul is saying. Of all people, Paul with his history of beatings, prison, shipwreck and riots, knew the travail involved in the fashioing of that art- and the role that prayer played. Prayer offers an opportunity for God to remodel us, to chisel marble like a sculptor, touch up colours like an artist, edit words like a writer. The work continues until death, never perfected in this life." - Philip Yancey

In Your Arms

In his book "Prayer-Does it make a difference?", Philip Yancey features excerpts from his interviews with ordinary people on the subject of prayer. This particular one, by a lady named Susan, is quite a sweet gem. :) And don't we find ourselves in that situation from time to time?

===================================================================
"Often I pray myself to sleep. I try to calm down thinking to myself, I've gotta sleep, I've gotta sleep. Of course, nothing happens. Now when I can't sleep, I have someone to talk to. I don't have to manage life on my own. God can help keep my heart from jumping out of my throat.

I used to worry about falling asleep during prayer. Now, as a parent, I understand. What parent wouldn't want her child to fall asleep in her arm?"

Timeless Complexity

This is a really cool discovery! Sometimes we humans need to be reminded that God exists outside of time. :)

===================================================================
From Philip Yancey's "Prayer- Does it Make Any Difference?"
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Physicist Stephen Hawking cites with approval Augustine's notion that any God must exist outside of time. We humans are confined to a space-time universe that began at a moment of time, but God is not......

How does God's timelessness affect prayer? C.S Lewis decided it altogether reasonable to pray at noon for a medical consultation that might have been conducted at ten o'clock as long as we do not know the final result before we pray. 'The event certainly has been decided- in a sense it was decided "before all worlds." But one of the things taken into account in deciding it, and therefore one of the things that really cause it to happen, may be this very prayer that we are now offering.' Lewis notes such a notion would be less shocking to modern scientists than to non-scientists.

Learning to Breathe

I'm learning to breathe...
I'm learning to slow it down.
I'm beginning to laugh at my own flaws and mistakes...
I'm beginning to step out of the shadows of my past....
I'm starting to realize that at the heart of the universe
lies a smile....

Calling

Here's an excerpt from a really insightful article that I
read today about how Christians work out their life calling.
It certainly resonated deeply with me.

For the full article go to:
http://jazzymoo.multiply.com/journal/item/1

============================================================
GRACE@WORK MAIL 11/07
[March 16, 2007 Edition]

Commentary: One Life to Live

How do we discover our vocation? I believe discovering our
vocation is a life long journey. A good starting place is to
consider the primary calls on our lives. We have been called
to love God with all our heart,soul, mind and strength, and
to love our neighbour as ourselves (Mark 12:29-31). With my
abilities, burdens and opportunities how do I best
love God and neighbour at this point of my life?

And here is Frederick Buechner's oft quoted advice:

"By and large a good rule for finding out (your life calling)
is this: the kind of work God usually calls you to do is the
kind of work (a) that you need most to do and (b) that the
world most needs to have done. If you really get a kick out
of your work, you've presumably met requirement (a), but if
your work is writing cigarette ads, the chances are you've
missed requirement (b). On the other hand, if your work is
being a doctor in a leper colony, you have probably met
requirement (b) but if most of the time you're bored and
depressed by it, chances are you have not only bypassed (a),
but probably aren't helping your patients much either.
Neither the hair shirt nor the soft berth will do. The place
God calls you to is the place where your deep gladness and
the world's deep hunger meet."

(Frederick Buechner, Wishful Thinking: A Theological ABC, 
New York: Harper & Row, 1973, p.95.)

Surviving on legalised drugs

1) Caffeine (morning + afternoon too if necc.)
2) Vit B complex (afternoon)
3) Brand's essence of chicken...for emergencies. (or as Berno calls it 'Chicken Drug')
4) Watching a dancing milk carton, named Jiggy M.C Montgomery in Blur's MTV. (well, this is not exactly a drug...but Jiggy is rather hypnotic in an amusing, calming way.)

That's Michelle's current list of legalised drugs....they keep her up and running, operational lah basically. But sometimes their effect run out....and she ends up falling asleep while WALKING. Very bad. Potentially dangerous. Hmm...need to expand the current list of drugs. Michelle definitely can't live May's life....which is basically Michelle's life on super fast forward mode. Ecstasy has not been legalised yet.

But at least she hasn't been so sleepy that she falls down on her bum twice, like some other fren. *chuckles*

"Be Your Everything"

This is something that I need to learn....allowing God to really be my everything. Too often I try to be strong on my own, and I fail spectacularly; or I turn to various sources...who end up falling short anyhow, which isn't entirely their fault, cos they're just human. Interesting that the song is sung from God's perspective, so ministering....and i particularly love that choice of word, "LET me be your everything." Yes Lord.....if only I'll let you.

I'm learning Daddy....

"Be Your Everything" (Big Daddy Weave)
==============================

When you're lost and all alone
I will be your sure Way home
When you're left out in the cold
I will be your Shelter from the storm

When you're clouded by your doubts
You're surrounded and there's no other way out
I will be all that you need
And I'm here for the asking

CHORUS:
Let me be your Everything
Let me be your Everything
Look at all that I will bring
In exchange for what you have
Bring your sorrow bring your shame
Bring your suffering and your pain
Don't you know the price is paid
If only you'll let Me be
Let Me be your Everything

When you're wandering in the darkness
I will be the Light that guides you
And when Death is standing at your doorway
I will be the Life inside you

When you face your deepest fears
When you can't see through all the tears
I will stay year after year
So patiently waiting ... hear me saying ...

CHORUS

Neither height nor depth, nor life or death
The angels above or the demons beneath the sea
Could ever separate you from
The love in me, so won't you let me be

Forth Eorlingas

(please bear with this rather messy, stream-of-consciousness entry....but I'm quite zombified by now)
It's been so stressful at work lately....a lot of deadlines, and last min changes throwing things into total disarray for me. It's not easy handling the whole programme on my own...and I don't mean to complain but I really feel like crumbling from the load sometimes. It's more of the programme planning and administrative work that I struggle with.....going into the classroom on the other hand is always a joy. I love love love my students. Somehow they just manage to cheer me up, and that just makes my day! :)

Today, as I was travelling to work, I had to psych myself by playing the "Lord of the Rings" soundtrack on my iPod. haha! Why? Cos that book/movie is my favourite of all time....it reminds me that there is some good worth fighting for in this world, and that one must always live passionately and purposefully. The last track I listened to was "Forth Eorlingas"....which is essentially the battle cry of the brave Rohirrims. I love it!! I remember Rie and I talking about some personality profile thingy....and how both of us fall into the category that has the need to "save the world". haha! I totally agree....and actually May is like dat too. :) I'm proud of you Agents!!

After work today...I got off at the MRT station and decided to walk home again instead of taking the feeder bus. It's been quite therapeutic and enjoyable...walking home. It cuts through some private housing estate and a park. I feel like Elizabeth Bennet. hee! :) "I'm very fond of walking". I enjoy singing as I walk home, and just talking to God. Today, He reassured me once again of the value and power of my work (something I just needed to hear so badly), and I found myself being moved to tears.

Lord, I really pray you help me to draw these students closer to Your heart,
cause them to fall deeper in love with You.
Lord bless us with David's single-heartedness,
We long to make You our one magnificent obsession.
Make my life count for You God.
Amen.

Hello there, beautiful!

The red, hot Nord Electro.....I wants it!!!! My gosh, isn't she gorgeous? You should hear the sounds this baby is capable of producing too. :) *croons Damien Rice's "I can't take my eyes off youuuuuuu, I can't take my eyes off youuuuu....*

Something's Missing

"How come everything I think I need,
always comes with batteries?"
- John Mayer, from 'Something's Missing'